There have been many times since Nathanael was born, that Jon’s fathering of him has brought tears to my eyes.

It wasn’t until the other day though, that I felt God show me why that was.

I suddenly saw that it was God’s fathering through Jon, to Nathanael, that made me cry.

In that moment I realised that the greatest gift I had been wanting Nathanael to have, was God’s fathering throughout his life, as that has been the greatest gift I have received.

He has healed me through His fathering.

He is the God who sees, and He saw and knew every detail about how broken I was, when I finally surrendered my life to Him at 20.

In those first few months He gave me a number of words, pictures and visions to describe to me the state I was in and what He was going to do to heal me.

In one vision I saw that it was like I had been in a car crash and I was on the operating table in a coma. He was working on me day and night, but I wasn’t aware of what He was doing. Then the vision changed and I was in a ward and He was still with me day and night as I recovered. After that I was able to walk outside the hospital leaning on Him, then when it became too much for me, I would go back in the hospital with Him.

He then outworked that healing over the next twenty something years. And although I’m still not the finished product, a couple of years ago, He showed me how those visions and pictures, including the one above, were now complete.

As a Father, He gives us destiny and purpose. He chooses and calls us to various tasks and He is so merciful and gentle, that He does that even in our weakness.

On one occasion, He asked me to do something for Him, right after I’d been weeping because I had sinned, having had too much to drink that night. In a vision, I saw Jesus get back up on the cross and tell me that He would do that again and again for me if He had to, but once was enough. Straight after that, the Father came into the room. He never mentioned my sin. That was gone because of Jesus. He told me He just wanted to hold me, and then asked me to do something for Him. That is the sort of Father we have!

As a Father He doesn’t wrap us up in cotton wool. He gets us to face our fears, and takes us on adventures. He knows we can do things we think we can’t, because He’s with us and it’s Him that enables us to do those things.

There are countless times and ways that He has led me as a Father in this way, but one of the first, was when I knew He was inviting me on a Father/daughter weekend. It was so I could do everything in driving I was afraid to do, driving a worship leader around the country: of course I accepted His invitation.

Over the years, I have received God’s fathering direct from Him, through my husband, through my natural parents, and through spiritual fathers and mothers.

However it has come, His fathering is the best thing I have ever had.